BETWEEN distance relationship and a close relationship, which will you go for? 

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That question was asked by a lady in her mid-thirties during an interview with a 60-year-old woman in New York, USA. 


The question created a puzzle on the Interviewer's countenance and more than a minute silence was tolerated. And there came a response that sparked yet another intriguing question; "Distance Relationship - Can it ever work?" 


When it comes to relationships nowadays, Distance relationship is currently taking the lead and so easy to begin because of numerous social media platforms buzzing out. Many adults are into distance relationships through social media platforms like WhatsApp, Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and so on. 


Many people have in one way or the other asked if a distance relationship can lead to a successful marriage. Has such a question ever crossed your mind? Have you doubted if a distance relationship can work out? If yes is your answer, then this article is rightly prepared for you. 


We will consider three (3) concrete tips that are very convincing beyond any reasonable doubt that a distance relationship can ever work out. 


1. ATTENTION

 

Giving or getting your partner's attention is a remarkable action that he or she is expressing a romantic concern in you. Denying your partner the attention needed can be very painful especially if your relationship is built through the social media platform. 


An example is Aaliyah, A 27-year-old lady in France who lamented bitterly about the sudden denial of attention she always gets from her fiance.

She said "Joe was such a guy that gives me his attention whenever I wanted it. We met through social media but it seems like We've known each other for ages due to the amount of time we have spent together talking on the phone and chatting online. 


Talking with some other person while Joe was still on phone with me drove me crazy. Before you know, 10 seconds silence turns to 20 then runs to half of a minute before ending with "Babe, Please I'll call you back, kinda busy now."

I was devastated, says Aaliyah. 


If you were Aaliyah, How would you have felt from such treatment from your fiancé? What's always your reaction if your partner reads your messages but fails to respond? Mad? Sad? Bad? Devastated? Then don't deny your partner the attention needed if you want the distance relationship to work out. 


2. COMMUNICATION

 

To build up a long-lasting relationship, communicating with each other is essential and highly needed especially in a distance relationship. Don't stay a day without hearing a "hi" from each other except a quagmire situation pops up. 


Communication on daily basis is greatly recommended in building a distance relationship, Since you cannot be seeing each other as it suppose to be, communication helps you to know and understand your partner very well - reactions to certain affairs, choice of words, likes and dislikes, ideas, intellectual mindsets, and name it. 


"My Fiancee stays in Lagos, a city in Nigeria while I base here in London, England. Communicating with her on daily basis helped me to discover how amazing she is and that she hardly manages her anger when she is upset. So instead of judging her on that, I learned to avoid making her angry." Jeffrey Relates. 


He continues; "In the evening after work, We often spend countless hours on the screen, chatting and video conferencing. We were always anticipating for weekends so that we can have the time for ourselves on the screen."


There are greatest benefits of a distance relationship since you and your partner do a lot of talking and learning new things about each other far more than how you would have known if it was a relationship that was geographically close by. Talk about how your day was, people that you hanged out with, places you visited, and what you ate, all these spice up sweet and interesting conversations. 



Are you in a long-distance relationship? Then make it an obligation to hear from your partner at least to say "good night" before embracing your sofa and pillow. 


3: TRANSPARENCY

 

Here is another effective tool that helps in solidifying your long-distance relationship. Can you reveal your innermost thoughts, feelings, anxieties, troubles, weaknesses to someone without fear of being judged or your secrets being leaked? Then that's what transparency in a long-distance relationship means. 


Those who are introverts hardly sail through in a long-distance relationship. A long-distance relationship is not for the introverts but rather for the extroverts. Don't go into a long-distance relationship if you are the type that keeps things only to yourself.


A long-distance relationship prevails when both parties are very open with each other. Don't pretend. Express your natural self and disposition.

Make it known to him or her what you like, why you like it, and how you would want it to be treated.


To make a long-distance relationship work out, Transparency matters, and this involves relating your good, bad and ugly experiences. You expose your desires, vulnerabilities, aspirations, and so on. Transparency builds a strong connection that triggers unwavering trust in a distance relationship.


But does Transparency means you should disclose your family's confidentiality or that of your friends? must you allow your partner to go through your private chats, your banking details, your phone calls, and messages for you to be transparent? The answer is capital NO. 


There are certain confidential information from a family member or a close friend that must be treated as family or within your bond of friendship without crossing to the third party even if it's your potential spouse. 


Transparency does not interfere with privacy. Transparency is in opposition to secrecy, not privacy. Let's break it down. 


4. SECRECY

 

Secrecy is the actual representative of your doings in secret. We hide our flaws, mistakes, negative qualities, darkest sexual fantasies, weirdest desires, etc. But with transparency, you'll have to gradually reveal all these to your partner. 


5. PRIVACY

 

Your phone passcode, Your ATM pin, your Facebook details, your banking information, your conversation with a close acquaintance or a relative are all private. Transparency doesn't mean you are to share every detail of yourself except otherwise. 


"Vicks had a long chat with his mum, and I was so worried and at the same time curious of what they both were discussing, Relates Sophia, a 27-year-old lady in Paris, France." I couldn't wait for them to end the chat so that I can bump into my husband and ask him what He and his mother were discussing after all we all vowed never to hide anything from each other. 


"But on the second thought, I came back to my senses that if it was something that required my attention, I would have been invited to the conversation. So I decided to respect the privacy my husband and his mom as well as not to bring up such issue except my husband comes up with it, by doing so, I earned and continue earning my husband's love and respect." She concluded. 


That's just one example that break down the bridge between transparency and privacy. 


CONCLUSION:- CAN LONG DISTANCE RELATIONSHIP EVER WORK OUT? 


So what have you discussed so far in this post? Conclusively. We have arrived at the most satisfying answer that any relationship no matter the distance whether short or long can work out if both parties are ready to work on their communication skills, Giving each other the necessary attention, and lastly being transparent. 


 If all the tips combined in this article are applied, Your relationship will be healthier and lead definitely lead to the expected outcome and you will be happier that all the efforts was worth it.